some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Randomize