Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Randomize
