you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
