a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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