i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Randomize