Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
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