Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated