Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
