Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Randomize
