I look better un-naked...
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
He has the fingertips of a God
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