I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
should my penis look like a turkey
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
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