So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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