So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
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