I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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