She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
i've created a new STD.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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