I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
