Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
