i don't like sucking hair
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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