he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
i used baking grease as lip gloss
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
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