i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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