ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Randomize
