This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
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