There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
whose ass print is on the piano?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize
