You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I could have mohawked her pubes.
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
