It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Randomize
