you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
