Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Im sitting next to shitfaced santa at the cuse game. My plan to be on television is now flawless
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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