I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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