is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
