My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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