I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I enjoy the company of your penis
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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