Texts From Last Night

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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels

  (1-603): View more from New Hampshire

  Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know

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  (603): Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels (1-603) Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know http://tfl.nu/7nn4
  Replies (33) Good night (3032) Bad night (735)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.

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  (613): So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely. http://tfl.nu/77c9
  Replies (58) Good night (8331) Bad night (2079)
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  (714): View more from California

  Who was that guy you went home with?

  (1-714): View more from California

  Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.

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  (714): Who was that guy you went home with? (1-714): Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now. http://tfl.nu/q2tl
  Replies (45) Good night (6556) Bad night (1276)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.

  (1-734): View more from Michigan

  Haha did she know what fisting meant?

  (734): View more from Michigan

  Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself

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  (734): Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that. (1-734): Haha did she know what fisting meant? (734): Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself http://tfl.nu/kykk
  Replies (21) Good night (1336) Bad night (5339)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?

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  (513): I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means? http://tfl.nu/ni5g
  Replies (12) Good night (4067) Bad night (954)
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  (626): View more from California

  Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?

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  (626): Did they have a limo or was i just stoned? http://tfl.nu/ui6f
  Replies (4) Good night (2051) Bad night (981)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit

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  (901): He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit http://tfl.nu/0txt
  Replies (8) Good night (869) Bad night (2457)
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.

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  (505): My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help. http://tfl.nu/hde2
  Replies (18) Good night (3399) Bad night (1206)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours

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  (419): You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours http://tfl.nu/i7uw
  Replies (2) Good night (2072) Bad night (674)
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  (631): View more from New York

  You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles

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  (631): You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles http://tfl.nu/nfjp
  Replies (12) Good night (2539) Bad night (668)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?

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  (620): would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him? http://tfl.nu/7gug
  Replies (4) Good night (915) Bad night (534)
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  (819): View more from Quebec

  I have grass duct taped all over my body

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  (819): I have grass duct taped all over my body http://tfl.nu/3nqm
  Replies (2) Good night (898) Bad night (545)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies

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  (406): I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies http://tfl.nu/i19i
  Replies (1) Good night (1051) Bad night (502)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.

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  (207): By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms. http://tfl.nu/wdsi
  Replies (5) Good night (523) Bad night (236)
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  (708): View more from Illinois

  I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.

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  (708): I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask. http://tfl.nu/zz6r
  Replies (7) Good night (1106) Bad night (469)

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