when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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