Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
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