we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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