Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Pants are for mortals
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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