are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
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