Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
