i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
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