All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
