The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
There's a dead frog in my kitchen?
Yeah, you found him outside and decided to give him a bath with your roommates electric toothbrush.
The worst part is that you sang Air Supply songs to him as you did it. Poor guy died in the middle of "Making love out of nothing at all"
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
