Screwed.edu
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
i think im in europe. pls send help
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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