My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
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