its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
