toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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