id be glad to
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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