the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
