I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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