Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Randomize
