Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
