Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
birth control should be required to get into college
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I want her autograph on my taint
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize