Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
what was i supposed to do!? wake up and actually ask her name??
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Randomize