Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
