Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
What's the policy for hitting on a girl at a funeral? She seems more bored than sad.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
